OT: Civil Procedure Humor

by Jeff Sovern

This is not consumer law, but perhaps readers of the blog will appreciate some Civil Procedure humor. I asked my CivPro students to write haikus about the course. Some samples: 

Minimum contacts
Then to hell with sovereignty
Now it's personal!
I think about you
In substance and procedure
Isn't that Erie?
More after the fold

I think of Civ Pro
even on my motor bike
Damn you Asahi
O, Erie Doctrine,
Tell me what laws I should use,
State or Federal? 
A comment on the DeFunis case from the seventies brought by a would-be law student who claimed he had been denied admission because of reverse discrimination. The lower courts ordered the school to admit him and by the time the Supreme Court heard the case, he was on the verge of graduating:
Did they not teach you
By your third year of law school
That your case is moot
And one about the Court's 2013 decision in Hollingsworth v. Perry on gay marriage, dismising a challenge to California's Proposition 8:
The only complaint
About sweet Perry's wedding:
Third party standing 
Shoe; Not as fashionable
As you would think it.

no jurisdiction,

nor power to be had o'er

a vagabond heart

Oh Jurisdiction,
I am haunted in my dreams, 
When are you present  
You're from New Jersey?
I would recommend changing
your domicile
And some prose: when we talked about principal place of business, I noted that the address for the New York Jets is One Jets Drive.  Surely that will be the only Jets drive seen this season.
A final haiku:
I may travel far
But my one true home is still
my Domicile

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